Enough with the fantasy — reconnect to reality!

The search after love for most of us is very different than what is shown on T.V. But, even though most of us know to how to distinguish between fantasy and reality we keep on hoping for the prince charming to come and sweep us away. Unfortunately, even though we understand that most of the love stories in the real world are by far different than fairytales most of us still keep on waiting for some prince to show up in our lives. This phenomenon influences our choices in life, causing us to pass on a lot of good opportunities that appears on our radar. Eventually most us stays alone or start to wake up when the biological clock starts to tick, compromising for the first person that passes by.

stereotypes_spectaclesHence, it is not a surprise that after a while one starts to feel unsatisfied and unhappy from his/hers romantic relationship. This is one of the main reasons for high percentage of divorces in the post-modern society. In some countries in the world there’s even an express divorce, annulling the marriage status within a week. Though we see that in conservative and religious societies the meaning of marriage is transform into something that is more important than one member. This allows one not to think only about him/her self and become less selfish. Because, one of the main problems in the post-modern world is that the society has transformed from a collective environment into individual environment, highlighting the importance of I, instead of us.

I guess it’s not shocking to find out that a 35 years old woman with high education and a very good social-economical status truly believes she deserves someone that at least is in the same status as her. This absurd thought of judging a person upon his financial and education status is leaving her solitary. This is not unusual situation since the society helps to define those thought through stereotypes that were assimilated by social codes as we grow up. While, she started to achieve what she has today, the years passed through and the men in her age prefer younger «flesh». Though this sounds a bit chauvinist it’s the sad truth. Because this is what the society endow from a very young age. And if a women allows herself to have a lot of sexual partners until, she decided to settle down she is perceived as unserious for marriage material. And once again she finds herself alone or compromising about her partner only for her desire to have children one day.

I think we as society have to change our way of thinking and to create a new kinds of “stereotypes” with positive perspectives about independent women and mainly about what is love. Only this way the society will avoid bad experiences of individuals regarding love incidents. Perhaps this way our society will be more stable and healthy that it is today. Just think what kind of examples we are leaving for our next generation to deal with.

Danielle Antebi